Family

I sort of love my family! These were our Easter pictures...we never made it to the bluebonnets this year and I am super sad about that. Everyone had horrible allergies, and Lyla had the flu and one thing after another. We just missed them! So we took pictures on my bed! They turned out pretty good! The family one is with a timer again, not bad! I'm so very grateful for my Savior and his birth and death! I'm grateful for the death part cause that means as long as I stay worthy, I get to be with family for eternity! How wonderful is that? I cant wait! What would be the point in suffering through this life if we didn't have that opportunity later? I sure wouldn't want to be here learning and growing if I didn't have that promise! I hope that I can be the mom Ive always wanted to be to my kids...I hope I'm teaching them what they need, and loving them they way they need. Ive had some hard moments lately, so hard realizations. I need my Heavenly Father and my Savior! I need help every day. I am horrible at asking for it too. I sometimes (a lot actually) don't even feel worthy to pray to Him and talk to Him about my problems and my fears. I so need his guidance. I know I'm not the mom I always thought I would be, I yell way more than I every thought I would, I don't play with them enough and many more things. I'm finding it hard to figure out a balance. How does one person do EVERYTHING? Clean, cook, laundry, bathe, eat herself, take care of herself (shower, exercise...), grocery shop, run here and there, PTA, church callings, play with kids, dress kids, etc etc? Its so very hard. Harder than I ever realized. I know my Heavenly Father will help me, I know I am worthy to ask Him. I just need to remind myself of that...that's hard sometimes! Anyway, so now that Ive rambled my inner fears. I do know my Heavenly Father lives, and He loves me, and watches out for me, and my family! I'm grateful for His Son, Jesus Christ and for His suffering for me. That I might return and live with Him and my family again! 

I will forever be grateful for that!